My Happenings

This is mainly for me to piece my life together hoping I can find a pattern or key to understanding. I usually ignore, bury, conceal these insights, but if I let them out maybe I can find some answers...These occurances are not in chronological order, but I will number them for reference. It may sound like I'm crazy, and yes I have been in therapy, but much of this doesn't happen to me anymore, and I didn't need any medication to stop it! My heart goes out to all the sensitive children out there that are tormented by visions of the other side... This list is very hard for me to type because I can't remember what I've already typed. Some of these things probably have natural explanations and I will later organize them from the more supernatural mysterious to the metaphoric symbolic synchronistic, to the mundane.
(I will add more info later)

---------
-Out of Body Experiences
-Psychokenesis?
-Visions (Clairvoyance)
-Ghosts
-Voices (Clairaudience)
-Sensing Illness
-Smelling Roses (Clar......)
-Food
-
______________________________________________
1. I woke up a couple months ago with Jeff's baseball bat under my pillow. We don't know how it got there, but I do remember dreaming of a metal bat multiplying itself within a white background. Jeff remembers placing the bat beside the bed (for protection) before he laid down, then felt for it before he fell asleep and it was gone.

2. This connects with incident 1., only this time it was a pocket knife next to my hip... I laid down in bed, then got up because I thought I forgot something then my hand brushed the knife. Maybe it fell out of Jeff's pocket earlier?

3. My dog and I saw an image of Jesus on my bedroom wall one night during childhood. We didn't act scared because there was this overwhelming sense of peace in the air.

4. Woke up to the sound of a choir singing (a C major chord I think) one afternoon while I was sick with some virus that broke me out in red bumps. I leaped up and spun around the room and saw no one, tv was off, and as I crossed the doorway it stopped.

5. While riding my bike with brother and a friend during childhood I hit the curb while speeding down a sidewalk hill and flew over my handle bars and missed a big hole in the construction zone of the street. The construction workers pulled my bike out, it was all muddy. I landed in a mound of dirt on the other side of the hole. I could see pipes cutting through the cement where they pulled my bike out. I remember soaring above my bike, watching it race into the hole as I flew above it arms stretched like superman. It seemed as if time stood still in the air.

6. One night as a child I prayed to God that if He were real, could He take away my emotional pain, then I felt this overwhelming sense of love fill the room. I was very afraid of it.

7. In 2002, while on a mission trip in New Orleans I had another vision of Jesus and felt as if I couldn't move as it woke me up from sleep calling my name. Then I screamed 'Help!' but I nothing came out of my mouth, but I heard my friend say ,"What exactly do you need help with?" in a stern voice. Then I was able to move and fell back asleep. The next day I asked the other ladies that slept in the same room as me if they heard me scream, and they said no. This when I first thought that maybe I had a neurological dream state problem. The next day was my birthday, and I was given flowers and a little stuffed puppy dog from the crew. The puppy was so cute, with little black and brown button eyes that seemed real, so I used to joke, "What do you know puppy?" as if it stored the negative energy from the night before. I know that sounds weird. Oh well.

8. I had these visions (at different times in my life) of a red/ blue light Jesus calling my name but I refused to answer thinking this can't be real

9. While in Marshall, Texas for a church revival I had a vision of an arm clawing at me and felt as if I was walking through an emotional battlefield in the home I was staying in when I made my way through the dark to get to the bathroom.

10. Several times (especially during adolescence and teen years) I woke up not being able to move my body. I would try to scream for help, but my mouth wouldn't move, eventually I could wiggle my fingers then my whole body. Sometimes I couldn't breath. Sometimes this sleep paralysis was accompanied by 'night terror' symptoms such as feeling like something was chasing me, black fog swirling around the room, voices. One time I stopped struggling to move and felt like I feel through my bed (falling feeling) and heard other voices say, "Where's my car?," and things I don't remember.

11. While I was thinking about my ninth grade science paper on dinosaurs I asked, "What made the dinos extinct?" I soon saw an image of water shooting up from the earth as if an asteroid created a massive crater. I don't know if this is true or not.

12. One night while searching the universe (meditating) for the answer to the Heaven's Gate Cult
claim of living on an asteroid behind the comet Hale Bop? I felt as if I left my body. I think this was around 1996? and the cult leader Doe claimed to be an extraterrestrial and convinced followers to commit suicide to be reborn on the asteroid/planet? behind the comet. I felt as if I was riding on waves of energy through the universe, with each bump being the energy of a planet. Then I think I had a mental image of a green switchboard image as I jolted back into my body. I don't think I could comprehend what green image I saw, I just know it was there in my mind like I experienced at some point in time. It felt like there were other presences in the room beside my bed and I tried to sit up but my head felt soooooooooo heavy and full of static charge I had to lay back down. I don't know what that experience means and if it was a dream, man was it lucid(seemingly real).

13. When I am very relaxed, especially when it's rainy or stormy outside (I've read that the properties of water 'thin the veil'), I start to see white light around everything. I will start to see other colors if I am more relaxed, but I still think this may be an optical illusion of after images and not auras because the glare moves with me when I move my eyes. Needless to say, I don't relax that well in public and am often too busy or sleepy at home to focus attention on seeing auras.

14. Sometimes I can see outlines of light that look like people walking but I ignore it and try not to focus on it. This is very rare though, happening when I was younger.

15. I've had visions of crowds, seas of people, lots of times. Sometimes it seems like I am on stage facing them or just looking out from a platform. They are just standing there.

16. In pre-school I knew which child gave me chicken pox and when I contracted it. It was as if time stood still as Mikey ran passed me in the school yard (blacktop area). I was just going about my business then automatically said "Why'd u make me sick Mikey?" but he didn't hear me or care, then without thinking about it, without knowing or caring what type of aliment I was sick with, I went back to my business (whatever that was, I have always been a loner). However many days later ( I don't know, nor was I very time conscious), my ankles started itching like crazy, then mom took me to the dr. and found out it was the pox. I told her when and who gave it to me. And Mikey was not at school for awhile and the class found out later he had them too.
I wish I still had this 'sixth sense' which would lead to the knowing that I am a healer that auto popped into my head when I was young.

17. One day while playing with my toys, a knowing came through loud and clear, that I am a healer. I remember being aware of the thought, message, whatever it was, divine spark inside, and just listened, thought for a second, what does that mean, then I went back to playing with my barbies. Also for some reason the words 'quantum physics' were associated with this thought. I am drawn to quantum physics but don't understand it so I barely study it. Too bad being a doctor or physicist didn't work for me. I'm more attracted to shamanism, intuitive healing, naturpathic, homeopathic, but for some reason I haven't made much ground in that area yet, so I wonder how the skittles am I a healer? Maybe someday, someway?

18. Woke up one morning to a vision of the word Wicca in my mind's eye in gold writing with a black background. So I knew I had to research to find what it was from Wicca that could lead to my healing. I went to the bookstore, pulled a Wiccan book of the shelf, and the page I opened to in the front, had a beautiful short rhyme that moved my soul. It spoke to my situation, reminding me that life has cycles and of our beautiful spiritual home we return. I don't remember the title, nor do I remember the rhyme, but I thought, If I ever get married that quote, poem would have to be read at the wedding, which is a totally weird thought for me because I didn't ever want to get married or have a wedding. I still feel the same way, but am happy with marriage. Just don't like the legalities and will never waste money on a wedding.

19. I felt like I met the soul of my son like 3 years before he was born. I would wake up acknowledging the presence of his sweet soul and say Hi to him. At first I thought, who is this baby soul I sense around me, then realized he would later be my son. I kinda didn't believe that could be true, cuz I never thought I would have kids. And this occured during a time when I was really depressed, hating life and college and wanting to end it all. I thought it was weird that I was 'talking' to a soul that wasn't physically there but I felt him around me. He was very comforting. I am so happy I had my son.

*Ahhh, so many experiences, where do I start & end, its almost too tedious to write it down, Why have I ignored my soul for sooooo long? How do I keep from writing the same thing more than once? I remember too many things, then I go to type them and forget. But I have to write it for my growth, revisiting the magic, hoping it will come back so I can help myself or others with it if possible. I've always thought if I could ever harness a consistent gift, I would help people for free or for super cheap, and make a living in another profession, but I don't look down on those that do charge for their service because it's a law of the universe to be compensated for good deeds.*******************

20. I used to meditate in the garage growing up because it was the only quiet place in the house. One night while sitting in my parent's van, I had two visions, one neutral, one very scary. I had learned to meditate by focusing attention on the center of the brain not too long before this. I don't know how accurate of a technique this is, it was in a tabloid. While focusing on this joy center in the middle of the brain u begin to hear a ringing noise. I heard this a few other times while meditating, and felt quite happy and peaceful, but this night I saw 3 people standing against a white background, but I couldn't see their faces, 2)

21. vision of a baby maturing into a man

22. I have visions of people occasionally. Most of the time they are of people I have never seen or met. Some of them look like a crime scene. Some visions are just environments and their energy, like one time I saw a party with red curtains in the background and I jumped out of bed and did a little dance because I had a jolt of fun energy associated with it.

23. waking to a fading Circut breaker box on the wall in my room and a rabbit. I just read on Ellie Crystal's website www.crystalinks.com that rabbits were often screened images of ET's. Whatever that means I don't know, like does that mean ET's would snatch people's bodies but appear as rabbits so as not to scare us? I love her website and book (not done yet) by the way.

24. waking up with my soul upside down in my body

25. One time I ate some nachos from Taco Casa in the dark while sitting on the floor in my room and it was as if the food molecules were communicating joy to me. I think I had recently read about being thankful for everything in your life and respecting everything down to the intelligence of the vibrating atoms and quarks (& whatever else tiny theorized particles exist visible or not). Or maybe I read about how some gurus have survived years without food, water, eliminating waste in the bathroom.., they only survived on the 'calories' of God, the prana -breath (life force energy? see I study and retain nothing:( ) Pranayama. Anyway, I said a prayer before I ate with much excitement and thanks, then I dug in. So mouthwatering, delicious food! Maybe the vibe was just my body feeling balance from fuel or a dose of blessings from God, who knows? It felt like I wasn't eating food, but taking in energy, hard to explain, I guess it was not ordinary.

26. I don't know if this is something normal that other people see as well, but I see violet light emanating from digital displays, like from an alarm clock. The lines appear to arch out kind of like electromagnetic lines and the path of polarity. I can see the violet light in dim to darkness in the room.

27. Vision of a little girl in outlined in green light who told me that she was ok. I think she looked like a girl who I saw on the news, but I don't remember if it was reported that she was missing or died in an accident. I remember waking up as she was telling me what happened but I can't remember anything else. I don't remember what the date was because I don't know if it is real or a dream, but if anything like this happens in the future I will write it down.


28. During a depressive period in college I had several visions of damaged angry faces and heard terrible voices when I would wake up or try to fall asleep. But out of this low time, I had a vision of the side of a man's face that seemed normal compared to the other bad faces that would pop up in my mind's eye. The day after I saw the normal face, I saw a man that looked like him at church, he was a guest pastor who spoke a message that sunday. I only saw the side of his face in the vision so I wasn't sure if it was him, but his hair and profile matched. I was nervous, but I told some of my friends about the vision and they said I should tell him. I finally did and he said, something like, "Praise God, " but I think he may have thought it was weird, but he was glad that he was possibly a part of God's plan to bring peace to me. I don't remember what he talked about, but the vision was soothing and I remember his message as being poignant to my circumstances. Maybe it was some sign, I don't know, but I wish I had paid more attention to these spiritual 'gifts'. I remember leaving a note to my roommate that I wanted to end my life. I have never been that severely depressed before or experienced such 'demonic' phenomena associated with it. And yet I have felt depressed for most of my life. Part of my depression may have come from soaking in the pain from other souls at the mental hospital/treatment facility I used to work at.

29.


30.
40.
700.

For Entertainment Only? Send in the clowns or send in the Crowns

Why is it always 'for entertainment purposes only' when it comes to psychic hotlines? Those that experience this phenomena may not feel so entertained. I am not psychic, but I have had many 'supernatural' things happen in my life and I want to share this information so others know they are not alone. Send in the clowns...or send in the Crowns, the veil is thinner than it may appear...Does anybody out there care to share the mystical experiences they hold dear?